Up in the Air

If I was currently on my deathbed, one piece of advice I would tell you for life is the following: don’t watch Jurassic Park while trying to fall asleep. Because you will wake up in the middle of the night thinking a carnivore beast is standing above you, ready to have him a great, tasty, human meal. If you want to be stupid like I was, watch it, but if you are smart, just do not watch Jurassic Park while trying to fall asleep. Of course I would share and tell all of my lost family members about Jesus, and I would be praying a lot to God if I was on my deathbed, but for some worldly advice, that would be about it.

What a weekend and week it has been over here. If you are trying to not catch a cold, you should probably stop reading this post, because it is plagued with drippy noses and sore throats. To welcome us back to the rain, the season brought a friend with it, and that would be sickness. Karen, Carol, Katelyn, and Lum (currently in recovery), have all been struck down by the snot and fever monster. Every second that I get I have been shoving Vitamin C down my throat. There is no way I am going to spend my last week’s here in Cameroon sick! The few of us left have been congratulating our immune systems daily for continuing to fight the monster.

There was not much going on this last weekend. We had Bible study for a bunch of people with kids, we went shopping, we watched movies, ate pizza, oh and I was electrocuted.

Now, I have been shocked from time to time, especially here in Cameroon, if you are not shocked when turning on the TV, opening the fridge, shocked from turning the light on, then you must have one powerful guardian angel. You should tell that angel thank you. Like right now, because after reading this, you are going to get shocked.

Any who, it was a rainy Friday late afternoon. Katelyn, Kathleen, and I were running late from the market. We were supposed to take a truck load of missionary kids riding, but sadly our cab driver decided to take the scenic route from town, so we were running late. Usually we have a man we call when we want to ride the horses, and he then brings them from “horse land” up to the house for us. Like I mentioned before, we were running late, so we decided to track the horses down ourselves in “horse land” so that we could at least have a few kids ride.

Horse Land: The large chunk of swampy land where the horses graze every day.

There are four horses the Jackson’s currently own, but one of them is out of commission, totally not my fault…okay actually it is totally my fault why the horse is out of commission. Many of you who read this blog do not know me on a real personal level. Well, probably after reading this blog, you know me better, but one thing that you should know about me: I DO NOT RIDE HORSES. Sure, I love to look at horses, and sure I like to ride horses WITH A SADDLE….but riding a horse on a blanket, with nothing to hold onto when the horse is stampeding down the road with cars, people, and motorcycles all around you?…yeah, that freaks me out. I have been here for eight months, and no matter how many times we go riding, I still panic every time I have to ride a horse with just a thin blanket draped over it. So yeah, the Jackson’s happen to have a saddle, so yeah, I am going to use it. Sad thing is the saddle does not fit the horses correctly, so after riding the horse for about a good solid month with it on, he got a massive gash on his back. So, he is currently healing, enjoying the grazing life and the life of shots of penicillin in the back.

Anyways, the three of us ran out into the swamp land to track the horses down. Katelyn, the horse whisperer got her horse in a matter of a few seconds. Kathleen and I, well, it was not so graceful, and it took us about fifteen minutes of stepping in sinking mud and walking through sticky wet bushes to track the two horses down. When we did, we bridled them up, oh yeah I know all the horse terms, and we began to trek up to the Jackson house.

The man who owns the property told us to walk out with a horses a different way. So Katelyn walked out with her horse, nothing wrong, Kathleen walked out with her horse, nothing wrong. Then I come through with my horse. (So the three of us have our horses that we ride all the time. Katelyn rides her moody teenager of a horse, Macchiato, Kathleen rides her multi personality horse, Thomas [yes we named him after the jerk from Downton Abbey], and I ride my horse, baby.)

One thing you should know about baby: he is actually a baby horse. He is old enough to carry a 117 pound girl, so do not worry...I am not breaking his back. Another thing you should know about baby: he has no idea how to ride with someone on his back, much like how I have no idea how to ride on top of a horse. Another thing you should know about baby: he likes to “space out” from time to time, so when I tell him to stop, eventually gets there, but he has to side swipe every horse while doing it.  Baby = me in horse form. Me= baby in human form. We are kindred spirits.

So here we go, my turn to walk baby out into the road. One thing the man forgot to tell me when walking out of the gate, on the ground is a wire, and that wire has electricity flowing through it. I, spaced out much like baby, and not aware of my surroundings, happen to walk on the wire. Begin the shrieking and yelping! I must have kicked the wire up or something, because next thing I know, it is stuck on my leg electrocuting me. I cannot get this wire away from me. I somehow get the power to just run. Baby, spaced out as well, gets all FOUR of his hooves stuck on the wire as well. He goes ballistic! I forgot to mention one little thing, as baby is getting shocked and going ballistic, I still am holding onto the rope. Next thing I know, he takes off fifty miles an hour down the road. I am hanging onto the rope screaming, “I am losing him Katelyn! I am losing him!!”

He was jumping and bolting so fast, I ended up letting go of the rope. Baby takes off alone down the street with cars, and people all over the place.

This is no joke; a scene from Jurassic Park began to unfold. Cameroonians HATE horses, they are afraid for their lives whenever they see a horse coming. Now, this is a horse that is walking alone, with no one leading it. Cameroonians were screaming and running for their lives. It was as if a MASSIVE T-rex was taking people out. We yelled at one Cameroonian man standing there, frozen, to grab the horse for us….he couldn’t do it. His legs were literally shaking. Luckily, baby stopped right in front of the man, spaced out, and Katelyn grabbed him.  

Now, like I mentioned before, I have been shocked before, but not like this. My entire body was shaking; I was dripping sweat like I had just run 20 miles, and my left arm went dead. I was so afraid, I had no idea what was going on. As we made our way to the house, Katelyn, who was way ahead of me turned and said “I think I know why baby freaked out like that.”

“I think I know as well.” I said dripping in sweat dragging along my non-responsive arm.

I ran into the house, jumped into the shower, and rubbed my dead arm down with steaming hot water. I think I sat in the shower for about twenty minutes, totally spaced out. Kathleen and Katelyn came in a couple times to make sure that I was okay, and I was, trust me, I just have never been hit like that with so many volts of electricity before. A few hours later, I was able to feel my arm and everything was back to normal.

After that joyous occasion on Friday, Saturday came and went. Everyone was wiped out. We needed a weekend without any large groups of people coming and staying the night, so we had a small pizza night, just with the Jackson village. Sunday we had church, and then Kathleen took some girls horseback riding, and that is the extent of our weekend.

I am now down to six weeks left in Cameroon, kind of crazy, but I have been slowly preparing my mind and getting emotionally ready for the big move home. In about a week and a half the Jackson Village will be staying in Yaounde for two weeks (we have SIL meetings) so, that means that I have now only four more weeks in Bamenda…..AH!

Where has the time gone?

Well, I need to get back to work; I have been “painting” coloring pages all day. (Chris bought this new art program that fills in line art. So I am currently colorizing pictures that need colorizing for the lessons!)

I have been listening to the same song for the last three hours on repeat. (My favorite band released their new single for their new album...it is really great. I have been waiting for this single since 2009!) Random pointless information sometimes is the best isn’t it?

Well, remember kids, the life lesson from Sarah Newman: DON’T WATCH JURASSIC PARK WHILE TRYING TO FALL ASLEEP!

Have a glorious day,

-Sarah